Theological Assertion

I am a big believer that imitation is the sincerest form of flattery.

Theological Assertion - The modern Christian quest to discover, quantify, and actualize one's live purpose is a kind of crypto-holiness movement that (1) promises the unattainable (in this life at least), (2) gives Christians a distorted view of vocation, (3) obscures the Christian doctrines of repentance, hope, and suffering, and (4) presents a shallow do-it-yourself message of life change to unbelievers that is not evangelism in any true sense.

I welcome discussion on all points.

First, there can be no doubt that the therapeutic desire to realize the Christian life as defined by purpose is really a modern slant on good ole methodism. I recently heard something brilliant and entertaining from the brilliant and entertaining Rev Jonathan Fisk (who unanimously would win the Lutheran Blogosphere "New Internet Theologian of the Year Award" if such a thing ever existed... seriously, go watch his videos.) He correctly identified that the American church is overwhelmingly Baptist in its theology, Methodist in its practice, and Charismatic in its worship (thank you John Wesley and Charles Finney).

This holiness movement influence in terms of practice has given rise to all sorts of purpose-oriented books, bible studies, and even churches over the last several decades. Rather than see this as an improvement in the life of the church, discerning Christians should watch these aberrant developments with alarm once they realize the unintended consequences of such teachings.

1. Purpose promises the unattainable (in this life at least)...

Simul justus et peccator. We are simultaneously justified by the imputed grace of God on account of Christ. While we are a new creation in Christ Jesus [2 Corinthians 5:17], the old sinful nature still clings to our mortal flesh [Romans 7] in this life so that the life of the Christian is one of internal and external spiritual warfare [Ephesians 6; 2 Corinthians 10] that is only ended when the perishable passes away and we rise again in new life with imperishable and perfected bodies [1 Corinthians 15; Philippians 3].

Perhaps due to an improper appreciation for our fallen condition, obsessively chasing after purpose in this life gives the false impression to hearers that this perfected, fundamentally God-pleasing nature as a human being is attainable in the life of the Christian through discipline rather than through the death and resurrection of Christ. Sloppy preaching and teaching in this area strays dangerously into the theology of "infused grace" which is unbiblical and a Roman Catholic error that many synergistic Protestants seem to be out doing the papacy on in their zeal to realize the Baptist formal principle of "The Changed Life" and this Charismatic drive to perform mystical worship practices.

In this way, many protestant (and incorrectly named "non-denominational" churches) put the Bible and the Reformation aside and follow Rome down it's path of "Jesus saved you so that you can work harder to please God and either earn (in the hard form) or reimburse God (in the soft form) for your eternal salvation." The Bible does not speak this way. Instead, the good works for which Christians have been set aside to perform are actually the works of God through the Christian by faith [Philippians 2] for service to our neighbors. This principle of being "God's workmanship" stands directly opposed to the purpose-seeking idea that, while we are God's creation, we are fundamentally our own workmanship and we have just been not doing a very good job.

This distorted view of sanctification takes away with one hand what is only occasionally given with the other as legalism snatches away the sweetness and freedom of the gospel in favor of a new enslavement. To paraphrase Rev. Fisk: it falsely teaches that we have been set free so that we can be enslaved. This in itself is gross false doctrine that is dangerous to faith and injurious to eternal salvation because it places the trust of the believer back in his own works rather than pointing him to the cross and the hope that comes in our eventual perfection on the last day.

2. Purpose gives Christians a distorted view of vocation...

The doctrine of vocation is probably one of the most under-taught and misunderstood doctrine in all of Christendom. I submit that the void left by a true Christian understanding of what the Christian is to do and how he is to see his good works after conversion is what allows wrong-headed opinions like methodism and purpose to swoop in and take root. Christians have a legitimate need for training in a proper understanding in righteousness and good works. The faith within them cries out for this holy and practical teaching. When it is not given, well-meaning Christians seek anything that looks like it can fill that hole.

...but purpose is not the proper fit. Where a right view of vocation teaches the Christian to understand his place in the world wherever he may find himself at any given moment, "purpose" teaches him that his place in the world is some hidden mystery of God that must be sought out and discovered through all manner of mystical and rationalistic approaches. Purpose, calling upon mankind's natural desire to answer the question "what am I going to do with my life?", wrongly teaches you to look past the objective reality of where you may find yourself and who your neighbor is so that you can sink deep down within yourself to hear what God really wants you to do.

The reality is that God has already told you very clearly what he wants you to do: it's called "The Ten Commandments". They're written down in the book of Exodus so that you can look them up and apply them to every aspect of your life. Unfortunately, purpose distracts you from such pious self-examination and improvement in piety because, while the world moves on around you with ample opportunities to do God-pleasing works by faith, you sit and stew in your own egotistical juices as you try to discern what grand design awaits you in the kingdom of God.

The mother will ignore the rearing of her children as she sits in her bedroom praying for insight. The student will disregard his teacher's instructions as he wracks his brain over where God wants him to be. The worker will ignore the poor and needy all around him as he wonders what in the world he has been put on this earth to do. The pastor will skip proper sermon study and preparation in favor of spending hours contemplating whether God wants him to open an new ministry across town. Most tragically, churches will shelve the proclamation of the only Gospel which saves sinners from hell in order to help the above people find answers to their navel-gazing questions. It's all a horrible mistake. The military calls this "paralysis by analysis": you think so much about your actions that you fail to act and it is as if you never even engaged the problem at all.

3. Purpose obscures the Christian doctrines of repentance, hope, and suffering...

All one has to do is read the first few chapters of Ecclesiastes in order to learn that, yes, this life is full of meaningless vapor and pointless striving after ephemeral nonsense. It's a real problem that is a natural consequence of man's fall from grace in the Garden of Eden. This world is a pretty horrible and futile place and all of creation groans in anticipation of being destroyed and made anew. Because the law is written on man's hearts, everyone (Christian and pagan alike) is consciously aware of this threat of pointlessness. The entire field of philosophy is consumed with man's attempt to answer these fundamental questions: "Why are we here? What are we doing? How do I achieve meaning?"

Christ came to earth and preached the answer to these questions: "Repent! For the kingdom of God is at hand!" (The kingdom of course being Christ himself.) Later, his own apostles preached the same answer: "Repent and be baptised everyone of you for the forgiveness of your sins" and "Repent and believe the Gospel." The holy spirit revealed this same answer to Martin Luther when he wrote: "Our Lord and Master Jesus Christ, when He said Poenitentiam agite ("do penance" or "repent"), willed that the whole life of believers should be repentance."

Here we see the true "purpose" of fallen man in this world in view of the Theology of the Cross. Do you not know what you should be doing? Look to Christ hanging on the cross. Repent and believe the Gospel. The devil encourages us to obsess over the question rather than looking to the answer and the quest for purpose that is being carried out by the church is a tool whereby many well-meaning believers are directed away from the cross so that they can curve in on themselves. This is where the rubber meets the road in the ages-old battle between the Theology of the Cross and the Theology of Glory. Is this all about the redemption won for you and all mankind on the cross by Christ? ...or is this about you and what you need to be doing with the 80 or so years you may (or may not) have on this earth.

We live in a fallen world. Corrupted and fallen from the original goodness that it once possessed at its divine creation, the child of God will always feel out of place here. He will always feel as though he (along with the rest of the world) is falling short of expectations. This place will always feel futile, sinful, and devoid of eternal meaning. You will always feel imperfect, partially blind, and wayward as you journey through a world that is not your true home. The Christian church tells people truthfully that these feelings of ache and homesickness are valid and good.

Do you feel like you are not living up to God's will? Of course! It's because you aren't! Do you feel like you do not pray as you ought? Of course! It's because you aren't! Do you feel rejected? Of course! As a Christian you will face rejection! These identifications and feelings of heartache are the law of God working in your own heart as it faces the assaults of your sinful flesh, this sinful world, and that liar: the devil. The living faith within you that clings to the perfect will of God and at least partially recognizes how the world should be but isn't can clearly see that these things are not taking place around and within you. It's easy to see how the world is failing.

But "purpose" does not say these things because legalism tells only a half truth. Instead of telling you the truth about your situation and pointing you to Jesus, purpose makes the sufferings and crosses that Christ Himself said that we will bear into a flaw in your faith and an oversight in your practice. Purpose peddlers do not speak as Paul does who tells his sheep things like:

"Wretched man that I am! Who will save me from this body of death? I thank God through Jesus Christ our Lord. So then I myself with the mind serve the law of God; but with the flesh the law of sin."

and

"Yes, and I will rejoice, for I know that through your prayers and the help of the Spirit of Jesus Christ this will turn out for my deliverance, as it is my eager expectation and hope that I will not be at all ashamed, but that with full courage now as always Christ will be honored in my body, whether by life or by death. For to me to live is Christ, and to die is gain. If I am to live in the flesh, that means fruitful labor for me. Yet which I shall choose I cannot tell. I am hard pressed between the two. My desire is to depart and be with Christ, for that is far better. But to remain in the flesh is more necessary on your account."

Instead, purpose looks at your suffering and tells you that you are just not being Christian enough. Purpose does not point you to the only true hope which rests beyond the grave in a glorious resurrection. Instead, purpose mangles law and gospel by telling you to get to work because Christians shouldn't feel this way after all that Jesus has done for them. If you feel out of place and inadequate, the real problem is not your fallen condition: the real problem, in the sophists' estimation, is that you are living outside of God's true plan for your life. Once you discover and live your purpose, these feelings will subside.

I'm here to tell you that they will never go away this side of glory. Purpose is selling you a bill of goods. Your hope is not in yourself and what you could be doing. Your hope is in Christ and what He has done, what He continues to do, and what He will do on the Last Day. You feel this way because you are a fallen creature who is sinning and living in a fallen world filled with sinners. Your answer is not "try harder and conform better to God's unknowable will".

Your answer is "Repent and believe the Gospel."

4. Purpose presents a shallow do-it-yourself message of life change to unbelievers that is not evangelism in any true sense.

Since the completely erroneous teachings about repentance, hope, and suffering are believed by many American Christians, this is the "evangel" that they take to the lost. They preach the "changed life through better living that makes you feel better" because that is the message which has been given to them. The seed they cast falls on hard ground and in the weeds because it appeals to man's sinful need for autonomy and earning salvation rather than delivering the Holy Spirit through the clearly preached Word of God. It is not "the faith once for all delivered to the saints" but is a pseudogospel of Oprah do-goodism and sentimentality. It is a message that does not save. It makes people feel good... but the feeling does not last because the human invention of purpose, like all things under the sun, is vanity and a meaningless chasing after the wind.

Evangelism without Evangel

I am stealing this fantastic quote from an anabaptist layman who is teaching a pretty good Bible study over here:

"Evangelism is the most misunderstood word in Christianity. It no longer means what it used to mean. Evangelism means to tell the Evangel: the Good News. Evangelism that does not specifically state the whole Good News properly is just recruitment."

I am going to start making this distinction. It's helpful to call a spade a spade.

Self Awareness and Presumption

I barely know myself; why is it that I presume that I can know so much about my neighbor?

What Rap and Hip-Hop Could Be

Let's take a break from theology for a minute to talk about the poverty of modern culture. There are two aspects of this. The first is the selfishness that is pervasive and the attitude that says: "I'm doing this because I can... and I can do anything!" The second is the massive loss of true art in modern culture. Everything is so dumbed down, sanitized, and simplistic.

Check out this odd song. Both of my observations converge here. Not only are the ideas expressed in it way outside of normal popular music... this group actually uses old poetry principles like enjambment, unequal repetition, and onomatopoeia in the lyrics of their songs. Now if only they could get past the profanity in other songs we'd be set. Watch the subtle the transition of thought is as it slips from pride to narcissism... and from narcissism to arrogance... and then to tyranny!

I'll be happy to comment on my opinion of the views expressed by the author of "Handlebars", but for now I leave it to you, the reader, to analyze without further comment:


"Handlebars"
By The Flobots

I can ride my bike with no handlebars... No handlebars, no handlebars
I can ride my bike with no handlebars... No handlebars, no handlebars

Look at me! Look at me!
Hands in the air like it's good to be
Alive, and I'm a famous rapper
Even when the paths're all crookedy.
I can show you how to do-si-do.
I can show you how to scratch a record.
I can take apart the remote control,
And I can almost put it back together.

I can tie a knot in a cherry stem.
I can tell you about Leif Ericson.
I know all the words to "De Colores",
And "I'm Proud to be an American"
Me and my friend saw a platypus.
Me and my friend made a comic book;
And guess how long it took.
I can do anything that I want cuz, look:

I can keep rhythm with no metronome... No metronome, no metronome
And I can see your face on the telephone... On the telephone, on the telephone

Look at me! Look at me!
Just called to say that it's good to be
Alive in such a small world
I'm all curled up with a book to read.
I can make money open up a thrift store.
I can make a living off a magazine.
I can design an engine sixty-four
Miles to a gallon of gasoline.
I can make new antibiotics.
I can make computers survive aquatic
Conditions. I know how to run a business,
And I can make you wanna buy a product.
Movers shakers and producers;
Me and my friends understand the future.
I see the strings that control the system.
I can do anything with no resistance.

'Cause I can lead a nation with a microphone... With a microphone, with a microphone
And I can split the atoms of a molecule... Of a molecule, of a molecule

Look at me! Look at me!
Driving and I won't stop!
And it feels so good to be
Alive and on top!
My reach is global.
My tower secure.
My cause is noble.
My power is pure.
I can hand out a million vaccinations
Or let'em all die from exasperation.
Have'em all healed of their lacerations
Or have'em all killed by assassination!
I can make anybody go to prison
Just because I don't like'em, and
I can do anything with no permission;
I have it all under my command.

Because I can guide a missile by satellite... By satellite! By satellite!
And I can hit a target through a telescope... Through a telescope! Through a telescope!

And I can end the planet in a holocaust! In a holocaust! In a holocaust!
In a holocaust!
In a holocaust!
In a holocaust!

I can ride my bike with no handlebars... No handlebars, no handlebars
I can ride my bike with no handlebars... No handlebars, no handlebars

A Quote on Discernment

“Discernment is not simply a matter of telling the difference between what is right and wrong; rather it is the difference between right and almost right.” -Charles Spurgeon

HT: Fighting for the Faith, January 27, 2009

My Prayer

I beseech You, Merciful God, to come quickly and defend Your church. We have become like Israel of old as we dance around idols of our own making.

Though they lack tangible form, our new gods are nevertheless the work of human hands. We call them beautiful and ascribe power to them that does not exist. We rob You of Your due honor and grant great deeds to our idols that they have not achieved. We bow and celebrate beneath them every day. We love and serve them more than we love and serve You. We look to them for comfort. We hope in them for the promise of a bright future rather than looking to Our Lord Jesus Christ alone. In our extreme foolishness, we have abandoned Your law and are no longer frightened by it.

Reprove us in our wicked iniquity, O Lord, and send us men who are enlightened by your Holy Spirit. Stamp out this virulent evil that infects us. Call forth men and place Your Word in their hands so that they may come down from the holy mountain and declare Your righteous judgments to a rebellious people. Grant them the authority to utterly demolish our false worship. Lift them up and instruct them to melt down our idols and so that we may eat the ashes of our sinful handiwork. Without Your loving hand, we will continue to flounder in error and futility. Without the declaration of Your Word among us, we will continue to commit adultery against You as we search for other gods and other christs to please our selfish lusts. We cannot save ourselves from this situation. We need your grace.

How long must the modern church be caged in this prison of false doctrine that we have made for ourselves? How long will we be allowed to look on the true doctrine that was given to us by Your chosen apostles with irreverence and contempt? How long will You, in Your perfect and providential will, permit us to wallow in our idolatry? Almighty and Everlasting God, do not hand us over to the darkness of our own desires as You did during the darkest days of the middle ages. Bring us to repentance so that we may avoid being handed over to captivity and desolation. Replace our growing Scriptural ignorance with a love for nothing short of pure knowledge and perfect truth.

When You consider the disposition of Your church, do not look upon the hated false teachers with Your justifiable wrath, but look upon the weak and poor victims of these heresies through Your boundless mercy. Do not allow us to be crushed under the weight of our sin, but bring us out from under these lies on account of Your abundant grace. Give our mouths voice so that we might cry out to You for deliverance. Return us to Your word and holy sacraments.

Use the balancing of worldly financial matters to create in us a true poverty of spirit. Teach us to look to You alone for deliverance and every blessing. Cause us to see the futility of this dying world and give us the ability to forsake its seduction. Make this upcoming season of lent a true call to repentance and faith for all Christians. So often we must suffer and be brought low so that we can see our place as Your redeemed and reconciled enemy. Bring us back under Your just and perfect rule as Your servile creation. Overturn the tables and cast our money-changers out Your temple. Beat back the influence peddlers, vanquish the legalists, chastise the empowerment seekers, and cause the false prophets to be mute in Your temple.

Look upon us with favor, O God, and spare us from this wicked generation. Pour out your Spirit and stop this tide of maddening self-love. Bless all of Your undeserving servants with wisdom, humility, and discernment so that we may have the strength and knowledge to do Your will. Grant Your servants ears to hear Your Word so that it might vivify and renew us now and forever.

Above all, O Lord, hear the groaning of Your militant church. Come quickly and complete our deliverance through Your Son’s long-awaited second coming.

I humbly ask for all these things on behalf of my brothers and sisters in the true faith through the name of My Savior and Lord Jesus Christ who with You and the Holy Spirit shall reign forever and ever. Amen.

Moth, Rust, and Theives

Matthew 6:19-26 (English Standard Version)

Lay Up Treasures in Heaven

19 "Do not lay up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy and where thieves break in and steal, 20 but lay up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor rust destroys and where thieves do not break in and steal. 21 For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.

22 "The eye is the lamp of the body. So, if your eye is healthy, your whole body will be full of light, 23 but if your eye is bad, your whole body will be full of darkness. If then the light in you is darkness, how great is the darkness!

24 "No one can serve two masters, for either he will hate the one and love the other, or he will be devoted to the one and despise the other. You cannot serve God and money.

Do Not Be Anxious

25 "Therefore I tell you, do not be anxious about your life, what you will eat or what you will drink, nor about your body, what you will put on. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothing? 26 Look at the birds of the air: they neither sow nor reap nor gather into barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not of more value than they?

Hey Look! The Emperor has no clothes!

Todd Wilken hits it out of the park with this paper.

HT: Steadfast Lutherans

Who is the "real" conservative?

The "real" conservative is the one that actually conserves the historic view of the American political process and strongly opposes all parties as President Washington did. All others are too "liberal" in my book. I would hazard to guess that our First President would barely recognize this political system. It is a tragic loss.

What is worse, this current political season is marred on all sides by what President Washington called, "a spirit of revenge." In no other election, have I witnessed such blind, retarded sheepery. It is enough to make a true patriot weep. Any group or party whose primary focus is anything other than unity, sacrifice, and fidelity for the whole nation is an enemy of our founding principles. I quote our esteemed founding father:

The unity of Government, which constitutes you one people, is also now dear to you. It is justly so; for it is a main pillar in the edifice of your real independence, the support of your tranquillity at home, your peace abroad; of your safety; of your prosperity; of that very Liberty, which you so highly prize. But as it is easy to foresee, that, from different causes and from different quarters, much pains will be taken, many artifices employed, to weaken in your minds the conviction of this truth; as this is the point in your political fortress against which the batteries of internal and external enemies will be most constantly and actively (though often covertly and insidiously) directed, it is of infinite moment, that you should properly estimate the immense value of your national Union to your collective and individual happiness; that you should cherish a cordial, habitual, and immovable attachment to it; accustoming yourselves to think and speak of it as of the Palladium of your political safety and prosperity; watching for its preservation with jealous anxiety; discountenancing whatever may suggest even a suspicion, that it can in any event be abandoned; and indignantly frowning upon the first dawning of every attempt to alienate any portion of our country from the rest, or to enfeeble the sacred ties which now link together the various parts.

For this you have every inducement of sympathy and interest. Citizens, by birth or choice, of a common country, that country has a right to concentrate your affections. The name of American, which belongs to you, in your national capacity, must always exalt the just pride of Patriotism, more than any appellation derived from local discriminations. With slight shades of difference, you have the same religion, manners, habits, and political principles. You have in a common cause fought and triumphed together; the Independence and Liberty you possess are the work of joint counsels, and joint efforts, of common dangers, sufferings, and successes.

...

Towards the preservation of your government, and the permanency of your present happy state, it is requisite, not only that you steadily discountenance irregular oppositions to its acknowledged authority, but also that you resist with care the spirit of innovation upon its principles, however specious the pretexts. One method of assault may be to effect, in the forms of the constitution, alterations, which will impair the energy of the system, and thus to undermine what cannot be directly overthrown. In all the changes to which you may be invited, remember that time and habit are at least as necessary to fix the true character of governments, as of other human institutions; that experience is the surest standard, by which to test the real tendency of the existing constitution of a country; that facility in changes, upon the credit of mere hypothesis and opinion, exposes to perpetual change, from the endless variety of hypothesis and opinion; and remember, especially, that, for the efficient management of our common interests, in a country so extensive as ours, a government of as much vigor as is consistent with the perfect security of liberty is indispensable. Liberty itself will find in such a government, with powers properly distributed and adjusted, its surest guardian. It is, indeed, little else than a name, where the government is too feeble to withstand the enterprises of faction, to confine each member of the society within the limits prescribed by the laws, and to maintain all in the secure and tranquil enjoyment of the rights of person and property.

I have already intimated to you the danger of parties in the state, with particular reference to the founding of them on geographical discriminations. Let me now take a more comprehensive view, and warn you in the most solemn manner against the baneful effects of the spirit of party, generally.

This spirit, unfortunately, is inseparable from our nature, having its root in the strongest passions of the human mind. It exists under different shapes in all governments, more or less stifled, controlled, or repressed; but, in those of the popular form, it is seen in its greatest rankness, and is truly their worst enemy.

The alternate domination of one faction over another, sharpened by the spirit of revenge, natural to party dissension, which in different ages and countries has perpetrated the most horrid enormities, is itself a frightful despotism. But this leads at length to a more formal and permanent despotism. The disorders and miseries, which result, gradually incline the minds of men to seek security and repose in the absolute power of an individual; and sooner or later the chief of some prevailing faction, more able or more fortunate than his competitors, turns this disposition to the purposes of his own elevation, on the ruins of Public Liberty.
Without looking forward to an extremity of this kind, (which nevertheless ought not to be entirely out of sight,) the common and continual mischiefs of the spirit of party are sufficient to make it the interest and duty of a wise people to discourage and restrain it.

It serves always to distract the Public Councils, and enfeeble the Public Administration. It agitates the Community with ill-founded jealousies and false alarms; kindles the animosity of one part against another, foments occasionally riot and insurrection. It opens the door to foreign influence and corruption, which find a facilitated access to the government itself through the channels of party passions. Thus the policy and the will of one country are subjected to the policy and will of another.

There is an opinion, that parties in free countries are useful checks upon the administration of the Government, and serve to keep alive the spirit of Liberty. This within certain limits is probably true; and in Governments of a Monarchical cast, Patriotism may look with indulgence, if not with favor, upon the spirit of party. But in those of the popular character, in Governments purely elective, it is a spirit not to be encouraged. From their natural tendency, it is certain there will always be enough of that spirit for every salutary purpose. And, there being constant danger of excess, the effort ought to be, by force of public opinion, to mitigate and assuage it. A fire not to be quenched, it demands a uniform vigilance to prevent its bursting into a flame, lest, instead of warming, it should consume.

It is important, likewise, that the habits of thinking in a free country should inspire caution, in those intrusted with its administration, to confine themselves within their respective constitutional spheres, avoiding in the exercise of the powers of one department to encroach upon another. The spirit of encroachment tends to consolidate the powers of all the departments in one, and thus to create, whatever the form of government, a real despotism. A just estimate of that love of power, and proneness to abuse it, which predominates in the human heart, is sufficient to satisfy us of the truth of this position. The necessity of reciprocal checks in the exercise of political power, by dividing and distributing it into different depositories, and constituting each the Guardian of the Public Weal against invasions by the others, has been evinced by experiments ancient and modern; some of them in our country and under our own eyes. To preserve them must be as necessary as to institute them. If, in the opinion of the people, the distribution or modification of the constitutional powers be in any particular wrong, let it be corrected by an amendment in the way, which the constitution designates. But let there be no change by usurpation; for, though this, in one instance, may be the instrument of good, it is the customary weapon by which free governments are destroyed. The precedent must always greatly overbalance in permanent evil any partial or transient benefit, which the use can at any time yield.

Of all the dispositions and habits, which lead to political prosperity, Religion and Morality are indispensable supports. In vain would that man claim the tribute of Patriotism, who should labor to subvert these great pillars of human happiness, these firmest props of the duties of Men and Citizens. The mere Politician, equally with the pious man, ought to respect and to cherish them. A volume could not trace all their connexions with private and public felicity. Let it simply be asked, Where is the security for property, for reputation, for life, if the sense of religious obligation desert the oaths, which are the instruments of investigation in Courts of Justice? And let us with caution indulge the supposition, that morality can be maintained without religion. Whatever may be conceded to the influence of refined education on minds of peculiar structure, reason and experience both forbid us to expect, that national morality can prevail in exclusion of religious principle.

It is substantially true, that virtue or morality is a necessary spring of popular government. The rule, indeed, extends with more or less force to every species of free government. Who, that is a sincere friend to it, can look with indifference upon attempts to shake the foundation of the fabric ?

Promote, then, as an object of primary importance, institutions for the general diffusion of knowledge. In proportion as the structure of a government gives force to public opinion, it is essential that public opinion should be enlightened.

-Excerpts from George Washington's Fairwell Address to the Citizens of the United States - September 17, 1796 (look it up and read it in its entirity)

Shame. Shame on us all for being so foolish, lazy, and ignorant.

Myth Alert! Everyone Loves the Same Jesus

Don't think that we need to know or recite the Athanasian Creed? It is an important defense against heresy that you should arm yourself with. It is the only way to defend against the many false Jesus look-a-likes that are floating around. Sure, it is easy to know that the Jehovah's Witnesses are wrong about Jesus being an angel, but how do you know that the crypto-trinitarian error of the Latter-Day Saints is wrong? How do you know that they are in error? What makes them no different than other churches who are Christian but just have errors in doctrine and practice?

No matter what politicians and newsmen will tell you, the LDS faith is not Christianity. It wasn't Christianity when it was revealed to fallible men several hundred years ago and it remains a heretical belief system to this day. Here is a current LDS Statement of Faith by President Gordon B. Hinckley. You should read it with a copy of the Athanasian Creed in hand. They claim to have a Godhead, but it is not our Godhead. You will see that their Godhead is a unity of purpose of distinct individual beings; an alliance of individuals. They believe that the three persons are three beings that are one in the sense of their same purpose and cooperation. I have provided and important excerpt that draws the distinction between the LDS heresy and the one, holy, and apostolic faith (heresy is presented in red):


Three Distinct Beings


And so I believe in God the Eternal Father, and in His Son, Jesus Christ, and in the Holy Ghost.

I was baptized in the name of these three. I was married in the name of these three. I have no question concerning Their reality and Their individuality. That individuality was made apparent when Jesus was baptized by John in Jordan. There in the water stood the Son of God. His Father’s voice was heard declaring His divine sonship, and the Holy Ghost was manifest in the form of a dove (see Matt. 3:16–17).

I am aware that Jesus said they who had seen Him had seen the Father. Could not the same be said by many a son who resembles his parent?

When Jesus prayed to the Father, certainly He was not praying to Himself!

They are distinct beings, but They are one in purpose and effort. They are united as one in bringing to pass the grand, divine plan for the salvation and exaltation of the children of God.

In His great, moving prayer in the garden before His betrayal, Christ pleaded with His Father concerning the Apostles, whom He loved, saying:

“Neither pray I for these alone, but for them also which shall believe on me through their word;

“That they all may be one; as thou, Father, art in me, and I in thee, that they also may be one in us” (John 17:20–21).

It is that perfect unity between the Father, the Son, and the Holy Ghost that binds these three into the oneness of the divine Godhead.

Miracle of miracles and wonder of wonders, They are interested in us, and we are the substance of Their great concern. They are available to each of us. We approach the Father through the Son. He is our intercessor at the throne of God. How marvelous it is that we may so speak to the Father in the name of the Son.

I bear witness of these great, transcendent truths. I do so by the gift and power of the Holy Ghost, in the sacred name of Jesus Christ.

++++++++++++

Someone may say that this is just one Morman's personal opinion. They are wrong. Here is the official statement of the LDS church:

The Church's first article of faith states, "We believe in God, the Eternal Father, and in His Son, Jesus Christ, and in the Holy Ghost." These three beings make up the Godhead. They preside over this world and all other creations of our Father in Heaven.

The true doctrine of the Godhead was lost in the apostasy that followed the Savior's mortal ministry and the deaths of His Apostles. This doctrine began to be restored when 14-year-old Joseph Smith received his First Vision (see Joseph Smith—History 1:17). From the Prophet's account of the First Vision and from his other teachings, we know that the members of the Godhead are three separate beings. The Father and the Son have tangible bodies of flesh and bones, and the Holy Ghost is a personage of spirit (see D&C 130:22).

Although the members of the Godhead are distinct beings with distinct roles, they are one in purpose and doctrine. They are perfectly united in bringing to pass Heavenly Father's divine plan of salvation.

A Pacifism Reality Check

"Since pacifists have more freedom of action in countries where traces of democracy survive, pacifism can act more effectively against democracy than for it. Objectively the pacifist is pro-Nazi." -George Orwell

"Pacifism is objectively pro-fascist. This is elementary common sense. If you hamper the war effort of one side, you automatically help out that of the other. Nor is there any real way of remaining outside such a war as the present one [meaning World War II]. In practice, 'he that is not with me is against me.'" -George Orwell

People and nations fall into about eight general categories in this fallen world:

1. Tyrants and thugs who violently force their will on others to further their goals.
2. Defenders who are willing to violently stand against tyrants and thugs.
3. Pacifists who have the luxury of not being geographically close to tyrants and thugs.
4. Pacifists who are protected by defenders so that they can remain pacifists.
5. Pacifists who have yet to be faced with a real test of their pacifism.
6. Pacifists who abandon their pacifism when they are attacked by tyrants and thugs.
7. Pacifists who grant tyrants and thugs the freedom to kill and dominate people.
8. Dead or subjugated pacifists who were ravaged by tyrants and thugs.

Pacifism--like so many Utopian pipe dreams--tends to crumble each time that it is truly put to the test. Pacifism is only a good thing when war is somehow avoidable. Pacifists who have any sense at all understand that things are not so clear when pure theory meets pure evil.

Pacifism goes against common sense, justice, and self-preservation. It fails because man's sinful nature is set against such noble idealism. This is evident in the telling words of the radical pacifist Ammon Hennacy when he said, "Being a pacifist between wars is as easy as being a vegetarian between meals."

The tested pacifist will witness more evil, oppression, and injustice in his lifetime than any peace-loving soldier.

Happy Holidays

Get ready... I'm about to make some people irritated. It is time for everyone to take a moment to read my content warning. If your ego is a delicate lily, you might want to skip this one.

I prefer to say, "Happy Holidays" throughout December. I say "Merry Christmas" on Christmas Eve and Christmas Day. I guess that makes me a horrible Christian.

Before irate readers Google my home address to come drag me out for a public flogging, let me explain:

The word "Holiday" comes from the Middle English word holidai. It means "Holy Day". When you say "Happy Holidays" you are saying "Happy Holy Days". I refuse to surrender this pious greeting to a bunch of atheists and pagans just so that they can have free ammunition to further subvert Christ and His church. There are many Christian "Holy Days" through December and January ...like today: The Second Sunday in Advent. Are they not worth fighting for? For most Christians, they are not even worth learning about. We don't celebrate. We don't fast. We don't attend church services. What do we do? We shop and visit relatives.

The entire season of Advent is one of holy preparation, but who cares about that? The argument should not be over the syntax of a particular greeting, but what constitutes a "holy day". So when I say "Happy Holidays" you assume that I am talking about Kwanza and the like? That just proves my point. "Holy Day" no longer means a thing to anyone. I am talking about the feast and fast days of Advent. We are the ones being secular.

Now there are Christians today who hate the phrase "Happy Holidays" because it is being perverted by the spirit of antichrist to take away Christmas. I think that we have played right into the trap. We don't defend the meaning of the word "holiday". We just abandon it and retreat. Instead of preserving Christmas as the DAY of Christ's birth, we diluted the entire season by focusing an entire month on only one aspect of the season: the actual nativity. Saying "Merry Christmas" on December 1st makes about as much sense as saying "Happy Easter" on March 4th. Part of the impact of Easter is the Lent that precedes it. Part of the impact of Christmas is the Advent that precedes it. Apparently, we are just going to give that up to preserve the "important" days. It is obvious to me that Christianity is in full surrender mode.

To be honest, this blame game of silly word play is becoming quite tiresome. American Protestants created this problem when they threw out the church year and made the public Christian life about two days [Christmas & Easter] instead of a cycle of 365 days of Christianity. If we had preserved the feasts and festivals of Advent properly, we might still have "Happy Holidays" and the atheists would have to contest against a solid month filled with many Christian festivals and observances. We handed victory over to the atheists and the pagans when we decided that the Christmas season was only about the historic birth of Jesus. We gave them Santa Claus when we stopped preserving the true Feast of St Nicholas. We gave them the word "Holidays" when we stopped informing people that the word is a religious term. We gave them a foothold to celebrate other festivals when we surrendered all of our feasts in favor of only one: Christmas Day. Then we took that day and cheapened it with all of the secular behavior and traditions that we participate in.

This isn't about the secular trend of the holiday season. This is about the secular trend of Christians. As the church becomes more and more like the world, the world will find it easier and easier to marginalize the impact of the church. The fall of Christmas is not a problem of the weakening culture but a symptom of the disease of secularism in the church. Every year I hear people desperately calling out that we need to put the Christ back in Christmas. How about also putting the mass back in Christmas?

"Christmas" is also a Middle English word: Christemasse. It is a contraction of the phrase "Christ's Mass" or "The Mass of Christ". How many churches today actually celebrate mass on Christmas Day? Ask around: How many churches in your town will have services on the 25th of December? Most Christians do not go to church on Christ's Mass Day... because the day that they spend a whole month defending with shrill voices and patronizing arrogance is not really about Jesus to them. It is about spending time with food, family, friends, and gifts. Now who is being secular?!?

For all of their barking and whimpering about people not knowing "the reason for the season", most Christians today have no clue that "Christ's Mass Day" is not just a family day. It is a celebration of the church. Where and how you spend the 25th is a hint at what you really think the day is about. If you are one of the ones who makes it a point to publically state how much you hate how secular Christmas has become, you should take your own advice and celebrate it as a Christian should. If you do not even care enough to celebrate Christ's Mass with His church, then you are part of the problem.

It almost seems like Christians these days just want to shout and blame instead of think and work. We need to change that. So when someone wishes you "Happy Holidays", might I suggest a different approach? Instead of angrily pointing a judgemental finger and shouting "It's MERRY CHRISTMAS!", try bringing up what the word "Holiday" really means. Why not teach them about Advent, Christmas, and the future coming of Christ? It is a teaching moment, not a fighting moment. Too often, we fight when we should love and preach the Gospel.

Happy holidais and have a merry Christemasse!

How to Say Thank You

People often thank me for my military service. It is always nice to hear and I appreciate it. Here in Texas, this kind of thing happens all of the time. I almost never encounter people who are cynical or hateful while I am in uniform. As the situation in the Global War On Terrorism improves (just like I always said that it would), people who have been silent about their patriotism for the last couple years have started to thank me in public again. Just last month, I had a wonderful patriot offer to pick up the ticket for my wedding anniversary dinner. Yup, this part of the country makes a Soldier feel welcome.

As a matter of fact, I think that I can only recall one time that someone called me a murderer. He did not have the courage to say it to my face of course... he said it behind my back to my wife.

There are several different kinds of thank yous. They all come from different motives and perspectives. It doesn't take a genius to read between the lines regarding what the thank you really means. Once you've heard enough of them, you get really good at picking out differences. Obviously the one I appreciate the most is the one that comes from combat veterans. It is a great honor to have a hero tell you that you are doing a good job. I once had a WWII vet tell the Wounded Warriors that I was escorting that they were the real heroes. He said that the kamikazes in the Pacific were nothing compared to IEDs and child suicide bombers. This Iwo Jima vet told us that his courage looked pretty easy compared to what wars have become. He brought me to tears.

I also love to hear the thank you from members of military families or real patriots. You can tell by talking to these folk that they understand why my vocation is necessary. They may not have a full grip on what being a Soldier is like, but they know why they exist and what they are here to do. They understand that a Soldier's primary job is to efficiently kill the enemy and break his stuff; to cleanly end the fight for the sake of justice and peace. These people get it.

Then there are the thank yous that I could do without. First among these is the half-hearted guilt thank you. This happens when a real thank you is delivered and the person who is not really grateful does not want to be seen as unpatriotic. This is the guy in the grocery line who shakes your hand because he is not going to be the only one who didn't. This is the public official who supports the troops for the same reason that he has town hall meetings and goes to church: to get/stay elected.

Second is the very popular pity thank you. This happens when a person feels sorry for Soldiers and thinks that they are victims of the vast political machine that does not care about them. Frankly, this person insults my intelligence and ignores the fact that I volunteered. If all you have is pity for me, please just keep your thoughts to yourself. This person only sees me as little more than a pawn that is moved around the world to help rich people get what they want.

Third is the selfish thank you. This is the close cousin to the pity thank you and it comes from people who are just glad that you are going off to die instead of them. They say "thank you", but you hear "better you than me, bub." These guys are glad that you volunteered because that means that they probably won't be drafted anytime soon.

Finally, you have the fear thank you. This is the one that starts out feeling like a real thank you, but it reveals itself to be little more than worry about your personal safety. It usually comes out as, "You aren't going to have to go over there are you?" or "Gosh, I hope you aren't one of the ones getting deployed." These people mean well, but they don't understand the nature of a Soldier. It is my job to fight. It is my vocation to be ready to deploy into risky situations. If you are proud that I am a Soldier, please don't tell me that you hope that I will never do the work of a Soldier. We all want to avoid danger, but sometimes danger must be faced. If I am the man that this great country sends to go do that work, then so be it.

The best thank you is the one that takes sacrifice. Actions always speak louder than words. You can thank me if you want, but here is what I'd rather you do to show your gratitude:

1. Go visit a wounded Soldier and help their families visit them.
2. If you have a family member in the military, volunteer for the Family Readiness Group.
3. If you know someone who has just come back from combat, educate yourself about the symptoms of PTSD/MTBI and be ready to help us detect it.
4. Go find a family who has people who are deployed and help them with whatever they need.
5. Find the parents of a Soldier and congratulate them on a job well done. Give them the credit that they deserve.
6. Volunteer, donate, and become involved in the USO.
7. Get involved with the Wounded Warrior Project! These severally wounded veterans deserve your personal thanks alot more than I do.

In my book, until you have looked a severely wounded 18 year old kid in the face and told him (or her) "thank you" in person, you don't know the meaning of the words.

Sunt facta verbis difficiliora. It is one thing to say that you are a grateful patriot. Being a grateful patriot is another matter.

Need Help? Try The Patton Driven Church

I am always amazed at the silliness that surrounds modern church outreach planning. Sometimes it is hard to cut through all of the emotionalism, stupidity, jargon, and marketing. Nine times out of ten, it seems that well-intentioned people miss the mark when setting up a system. They create a shallow task force with too much zeal and very little courage or capability. They throw unarmed sheep to the wolves. They push all of their efforts against challenges that are nearly impossible while ignoring the areas where true success is almost effortless. They cast all of their energy in places where they know that they will be rejected, but ignore people who come to them with an open mind. They take the easy way out; the coward's way out.

The long term results usually speak for themselves. I am tired of all these baby-boomer hippies who are trying to reinvent a wheel that has been turning just fine for 2,000 years. Outreach does not start by the creation of some "missional" initiative, novel packaging idea, or inside the pages of some book. Despite what some people will tell you, effective outreach systems were not suddenly invented in the last four decades. The persecuted ancient church knew just a little bit more about courageous witnessing than a bunch of fat, safe, rich, and over-stimulated Americans.

Outreach naturally flows from unending catechesis and the Divine Service into a Christian's vocation. It is kept alive by the Means of Grace and sharpened by penance, fasting, and prayer. It is dirty and difficult work that takes sacrifice, empathy, and patience. Since that traditional model is scoffed at and ignored by people who listen to human sources more carefully than God's Word these days, I am now advocating that this ancient system repackaged as The Patton Driven Church.

Could there be anything more bold and motivated than The Patton Driven Church? I ask you: who has a better track record of motivating ordinary people to do extraordinary things in the face of impossible odds? Who is the expert at overcoming adversity and inspiring people?

We are Christian soldiers after all; not a Christian sales force that works on commission. It is all about discipline and training rather than purpose and goals. Oh, if we could only learn about leadership from a man who knew a thing or two about leading people to lasting victory!

General George S. Patton:

"Always do more than is required of you."

"I'm not going to subsidize cowardice."

"Untutored courage is useless in the face of educated bullets."

"I believe in the old and sound rule that an ounce of sweat will save a gallon of blood."

"Watch what people are cynical about, and one can often discover what they lack."

"Success is how high you bounce when you hit bottom."

"If I do my full duty, the rest will take care of itself."

"If everyone is thinking alike, someone isn't thinking."

"Never tell people how to do things. Tell them what to do and they will surprise you with their ingenuity."

"I don't know what you think you're trying to do, but the krauts ought to pin a medal on you for helping them mess up discipline for us."

---------------------------------------------
As a special bonus, I will throw in two military quotes that are not from General Patton:

"The more you sweat in training, the less you'll bleed in battle."
-An Old Warrior Axiom

"Only well armed and equipped, adequately trained and efficiently led forces can expect victory in future combat."
-General Matthew B. Ridgway

Not a Compliment

It occurred to me that people steal words and twist them. Bad people who have been identified with negative terms always try to turn that term into a positive. As an example, it used to be bad to be labeled "a thug" or "a gangster". It used to be insulting to be called "sexy" or "wild". The easiest way to stop feeling guilty for falling into a class of people is to render powerless the derisive terms that surround that bad behavior that made you feel guilty in the first place.

The term "Bible Thumper" is not a compliment. It was never meant to be a good thing. The two lesser-known brothers of this term are "Bible Basher" and "Bible Beater". All three of these are terms that suggest a violent zeal that is not meant to heal or correct. It is important that they remain negative terms because they define a very dangerous, unchristian behavior: any fanatical, patronizing, and hypocritical zeal that is all about defeating the intended victim for his own good.

Bible thumpers are Christian thugs who demonstrate that they know nothing of love, peace, patience, gentleness, or self control. They really do exist in large numbers and they are a legitimate reason that nonchristians often site for why they despise the church. Bible thumpers always want to defend themselves by saying the term is unjustified, but the behavior of Bible Thumping is counter productive and sinful. It damages the credibility of all Christians and pushes people away from Christ. It can never be justified.

I would know: I used to be a Bible Thumper.

Satan Offered the First Bible Commentary

Satan quotes God directly when talking to men. In the Bible, you hear him speaking as if he knows God's mind and intent. This springs from his contempt for the truth coupled with a limitless supply of pride and arrogance. You can always count on Satan to come running to help you understand what Scripture says. He is an expert. His beliefs are very Biblical--just ask him! That fact alone should make you question all statements and commentaries instinctively. You should always strive to see if God's Word is being taken out of context whenever someone starts thumping their Bible and quoting verses.

Now the serpent was more crafty than any other beast of the field that the LORD God had made. He said to the woman, "Did God actually say, 'You shall not eat of any tree in the garden?............You will not surely die. For God knows that when you eat of it your eyes will be opened, and you will be like God, knowing good and evil." [Genesis 3:1-5]

Then the devil took him [Jesus] to the holy city and set him on the pinnacle of the temple and said to him, "If you are the Son of God, throw yourself down, for it is written, 'He will command his angels concerning you,' and 'On their hands they will bear you up, lest you strike your foot against a stone.'" [Matthew 4:5-6]

Quoting the Bible does not mean that you are quoting it accurately or that what you believe is supported by what the Bible teaches. Believing that the Bible says something doesn't make it automatically true. Finding an isolated verse that seems to point your direction does not make you right and those who disagree with you wrong. Finding an interpretation that "makes sense" does not mean that you interpreted it properly.

The Bible is infallible. We are not.

How to be a Heretic

I have observed that there are three sinful axioms that are common to all false doctrine. They are necessary for false doctrine to thrive and spread. At least one of these three must be followed in order to fall into error and stay there. Most of the time, they are all embraced simultaneously with equal zeal and determination.

It is my belief that true unity in the church will be impossible until Our Lord Jesus Christ returns in glory on the Last Day and destroys these three devilish axioms forever.

Here they are:
1. Never let the authoritative voice of Holy Scripture get in the way of a good dogma or practice.
2. Never let the authoritative silence of Holy Scripture prevent you from making stuff up.
3. Never let Holy Scripture stand on its own; always be ready to explain or comment on what it really means.

Despite the plethora of bad doctrine out there, these are the only three causes that I have ever found. They make up the giant, red editor's pen that fallible people use to "correct", "clarify", or "contribute" to God's already perfect revelation. These axioms are the undiagnosed driving force of the Mr. Fix-its of the church who feel the need to make the faith "more powerful", "more effective" or "better" than what the Bible says that it is. It seems that these principles secretly lie at the heart of all error and heresy.

If you know of any others that I should look out for, please clue me in.

Irony and Manna

I have been defending the Real Presence of Christ's body and blood under the bread and wine in a discussion from some Reformed Christians. The discussion has turned to "The Bread of Life" passages from John 6. While you should go reread it for yourself, I will remind you that this is the part where Christ talks about being the Bread of Life and compares eating His flesh to the Israelites who ate manna from heaven.

I have been told that manna means "what is it?" in Hebrew. As a Soldier who has to eat an MRE more often than I'd like to think about, I can just imagine why the Israelites called it that.

During this discussion, I was struck by an incredible irony: God's people still call the bread from heaven "manna".

There is still a great deal of disdain (and sometimes simple confusion) surrounding the Lord's Supper. Paul writes and condemns the exact behavior at the altar that sent the fiery serpents to plague the people of Israel. Sickness and death follow the sin in both places [Nu 21:6, 1 Cor 11:29-30].

The more that I study these wonderful chapters from Numbers, John, and 1 Corinthians, the deeper the parallels become. There is the obvious typology between the Bronze Snake that was lifted up and Christ on the Cross... but it goes beyond that to expose our spiritual afflictions, the sustinence of Christ's Supper, the importance of proper examination, good discipline, and the need for steadfast obedience. This is very heavy stuff. It all boggles my limited, human mind.

Despite all of the debates about the Lord's Supper, Christians still gather around God's table and wonder about it. They still treat it with disrespect. The Real Presence debate consists of people looking at the life-giving food that God sent from heaven and asking, "Manna?" (What is it?)

Myth Alert! Restorationism

It is time to clear the air surrounding one of those myths that way too many Christians buy into because it makes them feel good about their belief system. This is the myth that I hate the most because I got suckered by it for decades. It breeds so much arrogance in those who espouse it that I cannot help but get hostile when this silliness hits my ears. It is time for a good ole history lesson!

Myth: "The early church that the apostles set up was hijacked by Roman Catholicism. My church is a return to that primitive Christianity. We are Biblical and you are not." You hear this tinfoil-hat conspiracy theory everywhere! It is embraced by everyone from unchristian cults to popular Christian churches like Baptists and Disciples of Christ. It is THE myth to believe if you are a big supporter of small groups and house church. This thing gets so bad that some Independent Baptists believe that they have directly inherited the teachings and practice of St. John the Baptist in some kind of bizarre mimic of apostolic succession.

It gets really bad when it comes to the Lord's Supper and Baptism. These legalists want to say that the early church was memorialist in nature and did not believe in sacraments. They will stand by this myth even in the face of all evidence to the contrary. The archenemies of common sense are those immersion-only zealots who want to give you speculation about the depth of the Jordan River and base their theology on the pictures that they saw of the Baptism of Jesus in children's books.

It is time to wake up and embrace the cold reality of facts... facts that are supported by historical evidence and documents that you can actually touch.

The Truth: Let's set the record straight. We need to flush this mythology of a utopian church that was just like yours now. Look at the evidence. If you like the early church so much, read what they wrote about what they believed in their own words. Follow the timeline:

33 AD: Jesus dies and is raised from the dead.
57 AD: By this date, the majority of the epistles had been written.
64 AD: St. Peter, the apostle, dies in Rome. St. Paul dies within the next few years.

between 70 and 180 AD: The Didache records, ""After the foregoing instructions, baptize in the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit, in living [running] water. If you have no living water, then baptize in other water, and if you are not able in cold, then in warm. If you have neither, pour water three times on the head, in the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit. Before baptism, let the one baptizing and the one to be baptized fast, as also any others who are able. Command the one who is to be baptized to fast beforehand for one or two days."

110 AD: Ignatius of Antioch writes, "I have no taste for corruptible food nor for the pleasures of this life. I desire the bread of God, which is the flesh of Jesus Christ, who was the seed of David; and for drink I desire his blood, which is love incorruptible."

181 AD: Justin Martyr writes, "We call this food Eucharist, and no one else is permitted to partake of it, except one who believes our teaching to be true and who has been washed in the washing which is for the remission of sins and for regeneration [i.e., has received baptism] and is thereby living as Christ enjoined. For not as common bread nor common drink do we receive these; but since Jesus Christ our Savior was made incarnate by the word of God and had both flesh and blood for our salvation, so too, as we have been taught, the food which has been made into the Eucharist by the Eucharistic prayer set down by Him, and by the change of which our blood and flesh is nurtured, is both the flesh and the blood of that incarnated Jesus."

200 AD: Tertullian writes, "It is of no concern how diverse be their [the heretics] views, so long as they conspire to erase the one truth. They are puffed up; all offer knowledge. Before they have finished as catechumens, how thoroughly learned they are! And the heretical women themselves, how shameless are they! They make bold to teach, to debate, to work exorcisms, to undertake cures . . . "

215 AD: Hippolytus writes, "Baptize first the children, and if they can speak for themselves let them do so. Otherwise, let their parents or other relatives speak for them."

Wow! Bodily Presence in the Eucharist... Close communion... Infant Baptism... Both Immersion and Sprinkle Baptism... Trinitarian Baptism... A ban on female church leaders... all within the first 200 years of the church! All but the last couple quotes occurred in a period of time that is even smaller than the number of years that have passed between the American Civil War and today. We are not talking centuries. This is decades.

Where was the memorialism? Where is the rejection of infant baptism? Where is the great archaeological evidence of a distinct early church like the one of the silly myths? When did the Roman Catholic Church swoop in and ruin your church on these points of doctrine? Did the whole church fall into error the moment that the dust settled on the corpses of the apostles? Did the next generation of pastors turn their back on what the apostles taught them? If that is true then the early church was a total joke. It couldn't stand for even 100 years on its own without universally embracing huge errors about fundamental parts of Christian life. That is really pathetic.

The truth is that they were not pathetic. They were zealous, bold, and determined. They went to their deaths by the hundreds under the persecutions of the STILL PAGAN Roman Empire under Nero. The martyrs that were thrown to the lions did not believe the bizarre teachings that you do. Their own writings prove it. There is an unbroken chain of testimony to support alot of doctrine that your mythological churches reject. It flows through the New Testament and right onto the papers of the leaders of the church only a few decades later. If we are going to trust any opinion about the early church, we should trust their testimony since they were the people who were there, spoke the original languages, and grew up in the churches where the apostles actually taught. No modern scholar can claim the knowledge and authority that the writers that I have quoted can claim regarding what the early church was and what it believed.

Do not be deceived by lies and fables. You can reject these doctrines to your own peril, but you have no evidence to claim that your false doctrines have a link to something ancient. You cannot point to a period where the early church was like you. That period does not exist. It is a mythological period like the Middle Ages that you see in the movie theater. The only similarities that you have are the cases where you have inherited things from the orthodox church and happen to still agree with the rest of Christendom.

Believe what you want. Just understand that you are very new and different. You are a deviation from the historical church, not a return to it. You are not orthodox. You are not apostolic. You are not a reform. You are not a restoration.

You are an aberrant deviation.

The Christianity 451 Home Game

*applause* It is time to play the Christianity 451 Home Game! Yeah! *applause*

That's right, Ladies and Gentlemen, the game where you get to sit at home and test your ability to think for yourself and perform basic grammar at a fifth grade reading level! How you answer this question will reveal how equipped you are to fulfill your Biblical task of proper doctrinal discernment [Gal 1:6-12, Acts 5:29]! Ready to play! *cheers* Yeah!

Okay... here is your sample text: "The ball is spherical, blue, and large."

Alright, that piece of grammatical text is absolutely true. Now using only the text, tell me which of the following statements properly communicates what the text is saying:

1. The ball is round, but not exactly spherical. This is because the word "spherical" is a metaphor to help explain how round the ball is. Round is what is implied when the word "spherical" is used. People say "spherical" when they mean "round" all the time. That proves that the ball is not spherical. It is actually round, blue, and large.
2. The ball must be spherical first, then it can be blue, and then it becomes large. The order is important.
3. The ball is spherical and blue, but sometimes it can be small.
4. The ball was spherical, blue, and large at the time when the statement was made. Now it can be pink. Therefore, it is possible to have a ball that is spherical, pink, and large. It is still the same ball.
5. There is no ball.
6. No ball can be spherical and blue without first being large.
7. A ball must be spherical in order for it to be blue and large.
8. The ball is spherical, blue, and large.
9. The large is ball.
10. A ball can be a cube provided that it is spherical, blue, and large.
11. The ball is spherical, blue, and large. The blue must be baby blue and no other shade of blue. All other shades of blue are wrong.
12. The ball is spherical, blue, mauve, and large.
13. The ball is spherical, blue, and large. Large is 2,000 inches. Anything under 2,000 inches is not a ball.
14. The ball is spherical, blue-green, and large.
15. If you believe that the ball is spherical, it will become blue and large for you.
16. You can make the ball spherical, blue, and large.
17. It is your responsibility to ensure that the ball is spherical, blue, and large.
18. We all know about the ball. Let's move on to worry about the rectangular prisms.
19. What good is a spherical, blue, large ball if it is not also fuzzy?
20. The ball appears to be spherical, blue, and large. It is not exactly spherical, blue, and large, but it has some properties of those things. In this case, the text is a metaphor to explain how the ball feels and behaves. It is like it is spherical. It is like it is blue. It is like it is large. It is none of those things literally. You have to understand the intent of what was said when it was said. We know the inflection that was used and can rule out a literal meaning. Ignore the fact that it was written after the fact in a textual medium that was meant to be read by those who did not witness the metaphor. You can trust our analysis even though it requires auditory data that we have never heard ourselves.

Do you have your answer? Good! *cheers*

Tell it to me. Be sure to break it down carefully and show me the grammar. That way I can totally ignore you and mutter, "Why should I believe your commentary over the other 19 commentaries?"

...oh and don't worry if you get the answer wrong. All that matters is that you are close, right? Heck, there is probably even hope for those guys who answered #5, right? After all I am sure that you will find plenty of churches out there who agree with you no matter what option you picked. My goodness, I am sure that the Holy Spirit revealed an option to you that I did not even think of. I bet there is a mystical prophesy #21 out there that totally flies in the face of the original text. There are churches out there for you #21 guys, too.

Most of this readin' and learnin' stuff is silly anyway. Jesus didn't really call us to do all this wisdomy stuff, did He? God preserved this book for 2,000 years so that we can lay it on our dressers and have a place to stuff birth certificates and wedding photos. The early Christians didn't go the lions so that we could actually study the thing like back when we were in school, did they? We're s'posed to be doing nothing but fishin' and growin' not doing all that hard disciplin' and discernin'. We should be lazy and just find a trusted source to tell us what the book says and buy every cent of it without ever checking it through critical analysis. All that matters is that you really love your ball and that you are around people who feel the same way about your ball....

...even if your ball is a tiny, fuzzy, pink cube.