The [Low, Low] Cost of Discipleship

Lord have mercy!

If there was ever a passage of Scripture that more preachers have done violence to through poor exegesis it has got to be Mark 8:31-38. (Okay... maybe aside from Matt 28:16-20... and, come to think of it also Matt 26:26-28... ...You know what? I'm just going to stop and move on with my original point.)

Mark 8:31-38. Never have I been subjected to more lukewarm, soft-peddled legalism in all my life! ARGH!

It is beyond me how anyone can hold a straight face as they preach this passage to support a purpose-driven theology of glory. God has a great plan for you, alright. You are called to die to self. You are called carry your cross to the place where you are made dead to the flesh and alive to Christ. Doesn't that sound like a ton of fun? Isn't that as cuddly as a bag full of kittens and rainbows? Doesn't that sound like the quick road to happiness and purpose? *smacks forehead*

So what's the answer? Well, certainly don't tell the people the truth about their calling. Don't nail them to the cross with the full weight of this passage and then bring them to life with total sufficiency of Christ's atonement for all sinners... heavens no! That's not pro-individual. That's not post-modern. That's not anthropocentric enough for us. We don't like the idea of us being total failures and Christ being a total savior. We don't want to be helpless like infants. We don't want a savior. We want an enabler... a divine life coach.

I have an idea: let's just invent our own exegetical damage control and soften the blow of Christ's words for the modern ear. Let's deprive our people of the benifit of the rebuke that Peter was given and tell them it will be okay if they just keep trying really really hard. Let's encourage them to keep deceiving themselves into thinking that every minor deviation from their original life plan is actually the hidden hand of God. Better yet, let's point them to those moments rather than to their baptism, the Lord's Supper, and the confession of sins. Let's put a veil on over Moses' face and pretend that we've got this "Christian" thing nailed down solid. *smacks forehead again*

Lord, when will You free us of this mediocre spirituality that is masquerading as deep, Biblical truth? When will You reject the message of these false teachers and return the wayward church to the sound doctrine of Christ crucified for the souls of men? How long must we languish, O Lord? How long?

Is it God's Will That You Are Tromented?

...or is it actually your own willful rebellion that torments you?

Hear the Word of the Lord: "But if a wicked person turns away from all his sins that he has committed and keeps all my statutes and does what is just and right, he shall surely live; he shall not die. None of the transgressions that he has committed shall be remembered against him; for the righteousness that he has done he shall live. Have I any pleasure in the death of the wicked, declares the Lord GOD, and not rather that he should turn from his way and live?" -Ezekiel 18:21-23 [ESV]

The Lord God says later in that same chapter, "Therefore I will judge you, O house of Israel, every one according to his ways, declares the Lord GOD. Repent and turn from all your transgressions, lest iniquity be your ruin. Cast away from you all the transgressions that you have committed, and make yourselves a new heart and a new spirit! Why will you die, O house of Israel? For I have no pleasure in the death of anyone, declares the Lord GOD; so turn, and live." -Ezekiel 18:30-32 [ESV]

These are not the words of a tormenter or tyrant who punishes and refines without neccesity. God gathers no pleasure or joy in inflicting suffering and death upon the wicked. God desires that the wicked repent. We serve a God of love. Read Ezekiel 18 and see that it is not God who is unjust and cruel. We are the ones who are unjust and cruel.

Let there be an end to your torment. Repent and turn from your transgressions. Turn from wickedness and walk in righteousness. Now this is not a revival of morals and ethics. God is not calling you to try harder and stop being wicked. Our Loving God would not call you to do the impossible!

He is calling you to the righteousness of Christ Jesus. He is calling you to mercy. Get out from under the Law that is killing you and live by faith in Christ.

As the apostle says, "Now we know that whatever the law says it speaks to those who are under the law, so that every mouth may be stopped, and the whole world may be held accountable to God. For by works of the law no human being will be justified in his sight, since through the law comes knowledge of sin. But now the righteousness of God has been manifested apart from the law, although the Law and the Prophets bear witness to it— the righteousness of God through faith in Jesus Christ for all who believe."

"For there is no distinction: for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God, and are justified by his grace as a gift, through the redemption that is in Christ Jesus, whom God put forward as a propitiation by his blood, to be received by faith. This was to show God’s righteousness, because in his divine forbearance he had passed over former sins." -Romans 3:19-25 [ESV]

If you are suffering, make sure that you are suffering because you are zealous for what is good [1 Peter 3:8-22] and not just because you are fighting God so that you can live under the Law when you try to have salvation and communion with God by your own works, on your own terms, using your own timetable, through your own methods or means, and according to your own limited understanding.

That was my own mistake for over a decade. It was a miserable condition and there was no peace.

Blessed Is the Man Who Fails to Please God

I rejoice that the Holy Spirit prevented me from enjoying the self-righteousness of my youth. I thank Almighty God that He did not offer the comfort or communion that I earnestly prayed for. I was blessed when He hid Himself from me as I struggled to reach Him. What a great, painful refinement of my soul!

Thank God that I was too weak to live well enough to be fooled into thinking that I was righteous. Thank God that I was too inattentive to be earnest in my good works. Thank God that I was too sinful to be clean, too hypocritical to be a good example, and too tormented to be joyful or pleased with this life. It was a bit of mercy that God never satisfied me with my enthusiastic false worship.

I was too lustful to be chaste. I was too arrogant to be humble. I was too judgemental to be merciful. I was too sinful to think that I was basically good; too much of a failure to think that I was doing Christianity correctly.

Blessed is the man who fails to please God. Blessed is the man who is so completely wretched that he could never see himself as doing everything that he needs to do to reach God. Blessed is the man who, because of his legalism, is so starved by lack of faith that he pleads for the Holy Spirit, but is left alone in the dark.

For those are the men who have had their ears and eyes opened by God's holiness that is found in His unforgiving and perfect Law. Those are the men who are having the rebellion and pride beaten out of them with relentless, divine fury. They are starved of faith, worked to death, and dragged to exhaustion. These wicked servants are being tortured... and for good reason!

Because they were not meek, they were destroyed.
Because they did not love, they were rejected.
Because they were selfish, their flaws were magnified and increased.
Because they did not believe, they were shaken to their foundations.
Because they wanted to buy holiness, they were given nothing.
Because they were foolish, they were handed over to their own futility.
Because they wanted to live, they had to be killed.
Because they hated Christ, they received God's wrath rather than mercy.

So that they are made a ruin. Their white-washed souls are broken open so that they can wallow in their own filth. They are crushed and degraded. They are handed over to their own foolishness and are allowed to consume themselves until they have nothing left but their own failure, despair, and fear. Not only do they no longer want to live their way anymore, they don't want to live at all! Not only can they no longer climb to heaven, they lack the strength and will to even lift one hand to protest their "maltreatment". They are totally broken and left for dead.

They would not listen. They would not hear. They would not see. They covered their ears and stamped their feet. Their rebelion had to be beaten down. Their loud, blasphemous voices had to be silenced.

And then, in that moment when all human words cease and all earthly means are removed, the Angel of the Lord puts away his flaming sword and declares, "Fear not! I bring you good news!" And that dead trash heap of hopelessness is illuminated as the gates of heaven, locked tight for years from the inside, are thrust open by Grace and the choirs of angels and saints begin to sing. The way is shown to these blessed, tormented souls through the Holy Word and the Blessed Sacraments. They are lifted up and their lifeless bodies are carried through the gates as the whole company of heaven rejoices at their arrival. The poor fools haven't even realized what has happened.

The pure and clear Gospel of Christ, the evangel, is here. What sweet music and refuge!

Every Lent, I return to the place of my ruin. I stand at the scar in the earth where my quest to be holy ended in a catastrophic colapse; a total failure of mind, body, and soul. I look at the smoldering crater and I marvel at my own stupidity... and the depth of God's infinite love.

Mercy

How much of our wretchedness and sin spews out freely in the last word? We all crave to possess it. We jump at the chance to have the last word. For what?

To win?
To destroy?
To witness suffering?
To earn the praise of men?
To preserve our pride?
To get even?
To compensate for our own weaknesses?
To reward a word of correction with malice?
To indulge our own stubbornness?
To relish in the sheer pleasure of the last word?

When our enemy is beaten down we have to deliver one more blow. When our enemy seeks a way of escape we have to attempt one more deadly shot as he departs. When our enemy strikes us, even in those cases where his attacks are feeble and ineffective, we must rage back at him with all of the ferocious wrath that we can muster.

We kill. And not just with our hands, but with our mouths as well. Our wicked heart controls them both. That is the source of this great ungodliness.

We are all the worst murderers. Lord have mercy!

Ash Wednesday by the Rivers of Babylon

...well, only one of them actually: the Tigris.

The chaplaincy on post determined that they "did not see much interest out there for a liturgical protestant Ash Wednesday service." We scrambled and put a service together anyway. Since I was the one making the arrangments, it was Lutheran through and through. We had public Confession and Absolution and the Service of the Word based on Divine Service, Setting 1 from my copy of the LSB. In place of the Service of the Sacrament, we wrote up a form for the Imposition of Ashes based on the litany and some the collects for humility and repentance.

As kantor, I chanted the opening versicles (Open Thou My Lips, Make Haste, and Gloria Patri) and three of today's hymns. I used one of my favorite Gregorian tones for all three to link them together as continuity milestones through the service. The songs were two Lenten hymns from St Gregory the Great: Audi Benigne Conditor and Clarum Decus Jejunii; and a 12th Century Hymn called Ecce Tempus Idoneum. I struggled with the organ so that the congregation could sing Alas! And Did My Savior Bleed for the hymn of the day.

I found a former Lutheran pastor turned Army officer who agreed to officate, preach, and impose ashes. Hearing Lutheran liturgy again warmed my soul and I had forgotten how powerful the readings for Ash Wednesday are!

Everyone loved the service. In spite of only having 48 hours notice and very limited publicity, over 30 people showed up for our humble effort. Praise the Lord!

...I should note that 30+ is a larger attendence than most of the Sunday chapel services here. So much for not seeing "much interest" for Lent from Protestants! :P

Paul Planted and Apollos Watered

It was Pr Benjamin Mayes who planted sound doctrine into my heart and brought me to the fertile soil of the cross that is found through confessional Lutheranism.

If Pr Mayes is my Paul, then my Apollos during this deployment is Rev David Peterson.

His audio sermons are found here and they are truly amazing! I am truly jealous of the Word of God that is given to the congregation of Redeemer Lutheran Church every Sunday.

Last year's Judica sermon (2008-03-09 #553) is especially good, but I have yet to find a single homily that was not worth the hours that it takes to download them with my <128k shared internet connection.

Thank You, Holy Spirit, for loving us so much that you have given Christ's church these two loyal servants along with all of the other preachers and teachers who have been bound to the gospel by Your power. And thanks be to God for the increase of faith that comes from the pure proclomation of Your Word!

Lenten Sonnet #2

What fidelity do we possess?
With hearts so swayed by daily passions,
To a man we thirst, we burn, transgress.
Not a man e'er deserves compassion.
We claim to love and profess our heart,
But our blackened souls bring us to lie.
Our dark minds spell doom from the very start;
And seek e'er more pleasing things before we die.
Thou, O Christ, stand ever faithful and true,
And for our betrayal You offer grace.
Our God of mercy forgives anew;
From the harlot the Groom will not hide His face.
A bride, now cleansed by water with the Word,
The church is presented to her King and Lord.

Lenten Sonnet #1

The works I wish all come to naught
While the fleshly lusts do sway my heart.
My high principles so oft forgot
As expedience rules each selfish part.
God's Law makes me toil and feign to rise,
But there is no constancy in man's estate
For despite my deeds and desperate tries
I ne'er shake the aims of a reprobate.
'Tis proved my loathsome self shall not relent,
But I worry not e'en though temptation flails
And Hell assails 'til human will is spent.
When virtue fails Grace peers past my vain travails.
In the self no more, but by Thy Cross I live.
Prostrate I sob, "Dear Lord, Sweet Christ, forgive!"